You never cease to disappoint.

The problem is, however, that I never cease to get disappointed by you. One would think that I would have learned my lesson...

Perhaps we can chalk it up to my optimism that one day you will be a caring, giving, selfless, genuinely kind person, instead of the cunt you appear to be.

Happy fuckin' Thanksgiving.

Addicted to love. Thanks, Robert Palmer.

There is a feeling of absolute panic that comes over someone when they fear they might be falling. This jump-out-of-your-skin feeling. And I've got it.

I'm a hopeless romantic
I am full of pretty lines.
It's also true what you've heard about me
I fall in love every time.
So please, let me down easy
If I am not what you want.
Won't you let me down easy
I've got a really weak heart.

Watching Tella make out with another woman is *not* my idea of a good time. Granted, it was all in good fun and with a fellow Coyote (which always was, and will remain to be "allowed") but my weak heart, in its condition, had a hard time absorbing it. I know those lips. Urgh. I'm going to bed.

Seriously though? Totally smitten.

::groans:: Marry me?

Rebecca and I kicked their asses in not only one, but TWO games of pool. They were supposed to make out as reward but Jacob wouldn't go through with it -- Dave seemed to be on board, however. Oh well. We were told to make this admission count.

I need a woman who is sentimental. Someone romantic; a homebody. But who also wants to get dressed up, go out for a few drinks, and have fun with our friends. I need a woman who smokes pot, but is highly motivated and passionate about her career. I need a woman with amazing hair. I need a woman who makes me feel sexy, safe, and needed. I need a woman who is completely different than the women I have previously dated, but that have the resonating good qualities about them that made me fall in love in the first place. I need a woman who is *present*, who doesn't flake out, who makes a promise and keeps it. I need a woman who likes to fuck. I need a woman who understands my flirtacious nature, gets that it's harmless and fun, but maybe gets a little jealous anyway. I need a woman who enjoys scrapbooking. But mainly I need a woman who gets that I am sensitive, and a little insecure, emotional, and sometimes introspective...and who *lets* me be all those things without judgment. And maybe even encourages me to be all those things, because flaws are beautiful, and I am not a perfect person -- I'm on a journey to discover who I am, and what I want. I have had my heart broken several times, and I am filled with scar tissue. But I am trying to be the best friend, daughter, lover, and girlfriend that I can. If you will be patient with me, I might just be the love of your life. Because I can love you better than anyone else in this Universe.